Why Women Should Play Fantasy Sports (Part 1)

When I sat down to write this week’s post I decided I wanted to do something a little different this time; perhaps a funny piece on how to trick your significant other into playing (or at least accepting your playing) fantasy football. However, that all changed when I moseyed on over to the Women Against Fantasy Sports website and read this (what I guess is their mission statement): “We are incredibly smart people who can’t believe that their spouses or significant others, family members, and friends don’t have anything better to do with their time than sit in front of a computer looking at stats, planning line-ups and whatever else they waste their time on. It is amazing how over the year we have grown…I guess that only makes sense considering so many are falling prey to this addiction!” My reaction was two-fold: (1) Oh, h*** no!, and (2) obviously, I can’t just let this go uncontested.

So, ladies and gentlemen, here is why women should play fantasy sports (or at least tolerate it without protest)

1. It can improve your relationship: Before you laugh, hear me out. With the right perspective, playing fantasy sports can improve your relationship in some aspects, and I’m living proof. If your boyfriend/husband/ significant other is anything like mine, talking on the phone ranks on his list of favorite things to do somewhere right between cleaning his bathroom and getting ball tapped (Again, hun, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry), so getting him on the phone, at least in an active conversation that doesn’t consist of grunts and single word answers can be quite a challenge sometimes. However, I’ve notice quite a change since, after making fun of me for two years for doing so, he began playing fantasy football this year. Why? Because as much as my boyfriend hates the phone, he loves venting about his underperforming players or basking in the glory of beating his friends more. And who does he call to discuss this? Me. Why? Because I can relate to his situation. Now, you may be thinking “that’s all well and good, but how does that help communication not related to football.” I’ll tell you how. Once you’ve got your boyfriend on the phone and he’s not in that “Oh I hate hate hate the phone, but I have to do this” mentality, transitioning from football to discussing your day and other topics is so much easier. In fact, some of our best conversations, including one about our relationship, have followed “Greg Jennings is the biggest disappointment of my fantasy career” griping. (I’m very bitter about wasting a higher draft pick on him!) Note: This comes in extremely handy when you have a fight and want to talk about it. Guys hate talking about fights so sometimes you have to trick them into such a serious conversation with a diversion tactic. Devious? Yes. Does it work? Yes.

2. Because you can beat him at his game: How great would it feel to beat your fantasy obsessed significant other at his game? For me, that feeling is priceless. However, if you’re not evil like myself and get no thrill out of beating the crap out of your boyfriend at something he asserts to know more about than you, then consider this: You can make this a friendly, reward driven contest. Maybe your boyfriend hates going to the fancy restaurant that you love… well, make it so the winner of your head-to-head matchup gets to their ultimate date night, or something along those lines. “But, Juliann, I know nothing about football or I know about football but don’t want to dedicate time to developing a great fantasy team.” Well, you’re in luck. One of the great things about fantasy football is that you don’t have to be an actual football fan, let alone, fanatic, to play and succeed. Thanks to the popularity of fantasy sports, as well as all those geeks “who don’t have anything better to do with their time than sit in front of a computer looking at stats” there are many helpful websites, SportsJudge.com for example, which come out with pre-draft rankings and weekly updates to help you select players and week-to-week lineups. Additionally, most leagues will show your players weekly projections, making it easier for even those who, like a certain friend of mine, think the quarterback throws to the other quarterback win match-ups.

3. Because it’s something fun to do with friends: Forget about your significant other, playing fantasy sports is also a great way to keep in contact with friends. Three years ago, I lived in State College, PA where I lived between 3ft and a 15 minute walk to the homes of the friends who played in a fantasy football league with me. Since then, I moved back to Pittsburgh to attend law school while others have moved all throughout the mid-Atlantic region, gotten married and have their big-kid jobs. Due to our insanely busy schedules, it’s hard for us to get together, however, at least once a year, we all take a break from our lives and have a live draft. During this draft we discuss what’s going on with our lives, reminisce about the past and openly mock each other…. Just like old times. Additionally, for months following, you get this same kind of interaction with whoever you’re going head-to-head with and anybody else who cares to comment on the your matchup. I guess through all this rambling my point is this: No matter how close you are, when your friends move away and move on with their lives, you tend to lose things in common with them. This is not because you don’t care about each other, but because you’re not involved in the newer aspects of their lives. Fantasy sports not only provides you a forum to communicate with each other all at once, which is especially helpful if you don’t have Facebook, or Facebook’s acid jean wearing, not so cool anymore older sister Myspace, but also provides you with a commonality to discuss.

Why you should tolerate it: Because fantasy sports being a complete waste of time is a matter of opinion any your opinion is not automatically your significant other’s opinion: Alright, so you don’t want to play fantasy sports and you think they’re incredibly stupid and a waste of time, well this doesn’t mean you have free reign to openly protest and guilt your man about him wanting to play. First, “waste of time” is a matter of taste and I highly doubt that everything you do, your significant other finds value in also. Most of the girls that I know who get pissed at their boyfriends and husbands for playing fantasy sports also spend time reading gossip websites, watching E.T. and the Insider, read gossip magazines, shop when they don’t actually need anything because they find it fun, read Twilight, etc.. I’m not knocking those activities, I’m a Twihard and need my daily dose of Michael K. (Dlisted.com for those of you who have not discovered this magical website), I’m just saying, that if you spend time doing things your guy might think are stupid and pointless, yet he doesn’t insist on you ceasing those activities, isn’t it a bit unfair for you to nag him about spending time on things he loves but you deem useless. Second, one of the biggest complaints women have about their guy playing fantasy sports is that he could be spending quality time with them instead. In fact the Women Against Fantasy Sports homepage has happy pictures of the things men and women could be doing as a couple if he wasn’t playing fantasy sports such as jogging together , him serenading you in the park, and him goofily spilling potatoes all over the kitchen. (Really, you miss spilling potatoes?) Now those pictures are great and all, but ask yourself this, all those things you imagine you and him doing together, would he actually be doing those things if he wasn’t playing fantasy sports? Honestly? Does he do those things during the fantasy offseason? Or would he just find some other hobby that would fill that time? Now, if your guy is neglecting you, the kids, his responsibilities or his personal hygiene in favor of fantasy sports, you probably have a legitimate complaint, but if the status quo is pretty much maintained with maybe a slight impact, what’s the harm in him playing fantasy sports.


Oh wait, there’s more! Just not this week; to be continued……

Women Against Fantasy Sports "Respond" to Jordan

On Wednesday, our newest SportsJudge writer Jordan Zucker (pictured here on the far left) wrote a brilliant article explaining why the group "Women Against Fantasy Sports" is completely misinformed. The WAFS have issued an "interesting" response. However, our court rules in favor of Jordan.

Stay turned next week for more from Jordan on the WAFS, and why women should love fantasy football.

And, also, my sincere apologies for Chris Carmona's recommendation of the Jets defense this week. We believe the rest of his weekly picks will fare much better.

Women Against "Women Against Fantasy Football"

Hello everyone. I am Jordan Zucker, commissioner of an all-female fantasy football league, host of Girls’ Guide to Fantasy Football, and a fervent advocate of the NFL. It has come to my attention that there is a group of women coming together to protest the so-called evils of fantasy football. I am here to set the record straight.

Fantasy football is the most brilliant of inventions. It combines pro sports, friendly camaraderie, stat research, gut intuition, and results to look forward to every Sunday. When I was first asked to provide a rebuttal in response to WAFS (Women Against Fantasy Sports), I was immediately enraged and went straight for the jugular. I wanted to refute the grievances and disparage the atrocities of these proclaimed “fantasy widows” who would criticize and condemn this amazing sport.

Then, of course, I took a hot shower to wash off the disgust, lathered myself in lotion (I am such a sucker for toiletries), poured myself a bourbon to relax, and did a little research on my new nemesis. As it turns out, these women aren’t exactly the enemy. The WAFS organization is not saying they are necessarily against the entire industry; they are just against their husbands being overly consumed with it. In fact, some of the women are sports fans as well.

OK, I will agree that being involved in 10 leagues can be considered overboard, but obsessions and addictions of all natures are dangerous. And yes, it is helpful to provide a place for people to share in their struggles, i.e. I Hate Cilantro.com offers a haiku page for fellow victims of the herb to vent their frustrations, just as the WAFS forum exists for women to gripe about their lives.

That said, the biggest flaw I found with the WAFS is this: if you are in a relationship where you feel you are playing second fiddle to the football league, fantasy sports is NOT the problem – it is just the symptom.

Here are a few other bones of contention where I felt they fell short:

WAFS showcases an issue from a woman who yammered: “My husband made a fantasy trade on our wedding night when he pretended to check on an airline flight.” Puh-lease!!! So what? How is that a big deal? Realistically, how long did it take him to do this, maybe 15 minutes at the most? The fact that he had to sneak this trade from you is a red flag in the first place. Don’t be so self-centered to think you have to be his only passion. Seriously, that would be too much pressure on both ends of the equation. Besides, if needy women who whine about not getting enough attention make my stomach turn, one can only imagine how their husbands must feel.

One of the philosophies on the site argues “a true football fan picks one team and only roots for and watches football when that team is playing.” WHAT?!?! A true fan will soak in as much of the sport that is out there! What if your team wasn’t the one involved in a game that had the day’s best action?!?! Besides, you can always root for your team to get the win and your individual opposing player to get the yards. Those interests are not at all mutually exclusive.

I don’t think it is right for people to be judged on how to be a fan. If you find fantasy ridiculous, then don’t play it. Obviously, the “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” approach is going to fall on deaf ears here. If you are downright opposed to playing the game yourself (why?), that is fine. Go ahead and watch your one game without switching the channels.

But WAFS, really? What's next? A website for men called "I Thought My Wife Married Me, Not Oprah?" No, because men are perfectly capable of keeping themselves occupied. So, I highly recommend you to find something else that you are passionate about, something that is so intriguing that you want to excel at it and spend time on it. If you can respect this, then you can congratulate your partner for finding something that makes him (or her) happy, because you can share in the same gratifying personal achievement.

WAFS claims that fantasy sports can make husbands “hollow shells of former selves” and turn them into “fantasy-obsessed junkies.” Well, some people are workaholics. Some people are lazy and aimless. Know what kind of man you chose before you decide to bear his children that you were hoping he would help you raise. Of course, being out of hand is a bad thing, but would you rather the habit be something less benign? An affair or a drug habit would be much more detrimental. Fantasy sports are relatively safe; they are stimulating. Count your blessings.

Basically, it comes down to this: If fantasy sports were able to make a man out of control and distant from his family, then something else was bound to do it eventually. Yes, obsessive behavior is unhealthy, but the perpetrator is not fantasy sports; it is just how the unfortunate problem manifested. In the meantime, be thankful he is happy. If you don’t want to share in his hobby, then find one of your own. Healthy relationships require personal space, support, compromise, concessions, and acceptances. Which means I personally have to get over your refusal to play. …Working on it.